I’m honored to announce that after years of honing my skills as an Advanced Procastinator™ (AP) student, I have officially accepted a position as Burnt-Out High School Senior at Imposter Syndrome Inc. Countless thanks go out to self-doubt, late-night stress, and of course, my 24/7 companion of LinkedIn itself. I couldn’t have reached this stage in my career without any of you. #GrowthMindset#LinkedInLunatic #Success.

I’ll admit, it’s been an intense journey. Over the course of the past two years, I’ve had the immense privilege of getting to see firsthand just how much the professional social media platform can wear down even the most motivated students. Through a curated feed filled with the most talented individuals from your age demographic, LinkedIn shows you the singular best way to go through high school — and of course, any deviation will result in an instant rejection from every college, job, and internship forevermore.

Of course, seeing so many stunning profiles of seniors getting into Harvard and Stanford, coupled with sophomores achieving more than I had thought possible for high schoolers, I should have just been encouraged to pack my schedule even further. Naturally, in addition to filling every moment of spare time, I also resolved to exponentially grow my connections on LinkedIn to boost my credibility, as numbers are the only things that matter at this point.

For my blissfully ignorant readers who aren’t linked in, LinkedIn has evolved to the point where its sole purpose is to grow one’s power and influence over the platform by amassing “connections” with other already rich and powerful users (kind of like how the U.S. government works).

By the time I had been on LinkedIn for one year, I’d connected with about 300 individuals from across the country (albeit mostly EHS alumni). Truth be told, I was satisfied, but I was wrong to feel this way. One can never be satisfied. Thankfully, my 11-year-old sister was there to show me the shortcomings of my thought process and steer me in the right direction.

“You need at least 500 connections to be legit,” she said, citing what one of the characters proclaimed in the children’s book she was reading (“Front Desk” by Kelly Yang — who, by the way, still hasn’t accepted my connection request).

Thrown into a frenzy, I steeled myself to gather the remaining 200 or so connections, regularly reaching LinkedIn’s weekly connection invite limit as (addicted as I am, I can’t bring myself to pay for Premium).

Doing so, I viewed hundreds of profiles of freshmen and sophomores who had twice as many connections as me, and that’s when I truly realized the deeper meaning behind my sister’s seemingly innocuous words. You see, I was operating on a “fixed” mindset, content with the connections I actually had met and known in person, instead of a “growth” mindset — growing my connections, that is.

So what did I do to make up for my woefully low connection count?

What any person with real goals in life does. I LockedIn on LinkedIn. For anyone I saw on my feed, I pressed that connect button like there was no tomorrow, regardless of whether or not I knew them, had any mutual connections, or even common interests. My heart fluttered every time that little red notification popped up under “My Network.” Alex has accepted your invitation to connect. Oh, joy! The high I got from that dopamine rush of seeing who’s accepted my connection request knew no bounds.

And yet…I still didn’t feel complete. This puzzled me, because as the centuries-old adage goes, “LinkedIn is Love, LinkedIn is Life…,” so what could possibly be missing?

Then it hit me. Sure, I was collecting people, but was I really connecting? Was I really seeing people for who they are or just comparing their accomplishments to mine? It planted the thought in my mind that maybe, just maybe…there’s more to life than just LinkedIn?

Thus, I’m pleased to announce that after months of deliberation, I’ve made the decision to take a sabbatical from my role as LinkedIn addict and aficionado to pursue a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity at Relaxation & De-Toxifying Co. Leaving my position was not an easy decision to make, but I realized it was essential to developing crucial skills my future (self-) employer will find valuable. Until we meet again, my hard-earned 500+ connections.

#LoggingOff #LifeOutsideLinkedIn