As long as I can remember, I’ve struggled with making friends, keeping friends, and always being the one left out. Over the years, I have learned past and current friends have made an influential impact on my life whether it has been good or bad. They influence what I do, what I need to focus on, and what’s most beneficial to me.

Elementary school

I was the weird kid, the one dressed oddly, with two missing teeth in the front of my mouth. I always sat by myself. No matter where I was, at the lunch table, in class, on the playground, I always got made fun of. I had no one to talk to, or play with in gym class and at recess. Everyone always had a reason to laugh, even if it was no reason at all. They knew I got weaker and weaker with every laugh, comment, and facial expression. I didn’t understand it. Why did no one want to be friends with me? Why was I so different then everyone else? My mom told me it would get better.

Transferring schools

I moved elementary schools, hoping for a change. I made a couple of friends who made me feel like I wasn’t worth laughing at. Disappointingly, rumors transferred with me. Though I moved far, the burden of being laughed at followed closely behind, awaiting my downfall. Despite the talking, and laughing, I made note of who really mattered most to me. I thought by middle school the rumors would leave.

Middle school

Why was everyone so rude to me? Why did people talk about me? Why couldn’t I be normal? From the constant drama at the lunch table, to people trying to confront me for something I never did, I couldn’t take it. I needed figured out the type of people I wanted to be around. I dreaded going to school. My
mom suggested I could try a sport to make friends. I agreed, and it was the best decision of my life.

I started playing softball in sixth grade. I was shy at first, because I always expected to be talked about. Two important people changed everything. I met two girls who changed the way I looked at things. My confidence rose, and I felt included in everything. I tried not to expect anything, but as time went on throughout middle school, I was invited to their house and actually treated like a friend. School still wasn’t great, but at least I knew who really cared.

Ninth Grade

Starting high school was one of the most stressful years of my life. I finally had responsibility, a job, and I joined high school softball. I started dating someone, and he made me feel like the only person in the world. I met his parents, and they took me in as family. Another family I gained was my new
friends that maybe weren’t great influences on my future. I dedicated most of my time to friends, which made me to study less and less, causing my grades to drop significantly. I hadn’t gained the self discipline to do better or fix anything. I ended up failing one class, almost two, and realized something had to change.

Tenth grade

My friends started talking about me, making me remember my elementary and middle school experience. However, this was different because I knew their comments didn’t matter anymore. I started to recognize my future is more important than anything anyone could say about me. I saved a ton of money for
a car, continued to improve with sports, and got all As and Bs in my classes. I still kept those same two girls as my best friends, because although I wasn’t popular, they were still always there for me. I’ve kept the same boyfriend, who has helped build a positive future for both of us.

Now

As a junior, I now understand that every person has made an influence on me, whether it’s good or bad, and I’m forever grateful. Not everyone is going
to make a positive impact on your life, but you have to build off of it, and stay focused on what really matters. One quote I heard years ago that I didn’t think was true until recently was, “The people you surround yourself with are the person you will become,” and I am now a firm believer that it is true.